Seeking our origins

The Stellazio Story [FF9]

2007-11-26T20:40:00.000+08:00

"The Story of 12 Zodiacs"

The 11 Zodiacs pondered. How best to catch Virgo's heart? Aries headed east.

Cancer headed to the cape where Virgo waited. The sun was setting into the ocean. Would he finally see her?

Scorpio was very timid. He always looked at his shadow until one day he decided to look away. He walked up a hill.

Gemini thought by the river, 'I will sing her a song.' He didn't know where she was, but he hoped his song would reach her.

Taurus had an idea. He would give Virgo a gift. Through the forest and over the mountain, he found a star.

Watching the sunset from the cape, Virgo whispered "My only wish is to be with you now..."

Libra was a perverse fellow. He would always walk in the opposite direction of the sun. Would he ever see Virgo?

Leo was waiting for the sun to set into the ocean. Then Cancer showed up, and they began to fight. Into the ocean they fell..."

Sagittarius dashed through the night, defying the chilly northern wind that was stinging his right cheek

Impatient Capricorn ran up a hill toward the sun and fell asleep from exhaustion

Aquarius arrived late. He asked everyone, "Who kissed Virgo?"

Pisces said to Aquarius, "Virgo made her choice. Go see her and she'll tell you the rest."

Their future was uncertain, but Scorpio and Virgo kissed in the light of dusk. That moment meant everything.

- The Stellazio Story
Taken from Final Fantasy 9 by Squaresoft

For those who haven't played Final Fantasy 9, the story presented was one of the sidequests in the game. This was one of the few things which I see meaningful in the game. The story of the 12 Zodiacs. I have no idea what genre this story lands itself on, nor think of it as an essential "must-know" for everyone, but I believe that the story has something to tell us. I've understood the story in such a way that I see the 11 Zodiacs, not competing for Virgo's affection or love, but searching the truth in their feelings. How true were their feelings for Virgo? In the end, it is not in what a person has to offer that matters but how sincere the offering is. Was their feelings true or was it just a simple desire to see Virgo's beauty? There are things in life that remain finite, but the are things that remain eternal. Sometimes we search for things in places which we believe hold what we are searching for, but how sure are we that it is the RIGHT place? We tend to stay on the paths that were made before us for we fear of getting lost, and thus gaining almost nothing in the process. Despite the fact that when we take risks, we get hurt and may even lose everything we have, but in the end we find what we are searching for. All we needed was a little courage to turn away from what we already know and venture into the unknown. In the end, we find the truth in what we've been looking for; the same truth that Scorpio had found in Virgo's arms.

WHY?!

2007-11-18T11:02:00.000+08:00

Why am I still expecting?

I can’t believe that she’s still there in my mind. Every thing was still clear to me; the thoughts of how she looked like and the fact that she was never mine. It’s difficult to see her laugh or even cry without me by her side. It’s difficult to accept the possibility that she has no memory of me anymore. After all, I’ve never had the courage to speak or even make myself materialize in front of her. Damn. What a jerk I am.

So why am I expecting?

I have no idea why. I have no idea why I should even remember her or even know her name. I have no idea why I should expect a buzz from her except her endorsements and group messages. I have no idea why I still remember her favorite color or even the first and last letter I gave her. The letter which I believe is now in some trash bin or recycling center. I’ve tried to forget her but I can’t. The regret that I never had the courage to speak to her still haunts me. The regret when all I did was to look away when I had a chance still resides inside my thoughts. Her smile and laughter still resounds in my ears. She still makes my heart weep for sorrow.

Damn. She made me forget my file case.

Missing everyone...kahit hindi halata.

2007-11-05T19:08:00.000+08:00

I've been missing everyone.

Ironic, isn't it? I meet these people everyday, talk to them, laugh with them; yet I feel somethings is missing. I'm not asking a lot from people; hell, I'm not even asking anything from anyone. I just feel weird lately. Well, weirder than the usual anyway.

Don't ask me if I'm ok. You should know better that I would just say "Ayos lang ako" or " Yep! *insert weird smiley here* " or even run behind you screaming like a kid, making weird "kokey-like" sounds. To tell you the truth, I'm not really ok when I get too "hyper" like that. To be really truthful, a lot of things have really been bothering me lately and I feel that everything might crash around me anytime soon. To be really, really truthful, I'd rather not say anything to someone. Why? because I don't feel like it and I don't even know how to say it. I'm not really a very expressive person. You can even read what's going on in my mind when you concentrate really hard >.<. I really don't like anyone to be burdened by my own problems. I believe it's my resposibility to fix the problems that I encounter. You can just sit on the bleachers and watch as I battle it out myself....against a team of monsters.

I'm really annoyed at all the shit I've been showing the class. Some people have even started seeing behind my mask, yet I still try my best not to show everything. It's not that I don't trust any of you, it's simply because I'm not feeling myself for the past 4 years. I'm not dying from any sickness or anything *knocks on wood*.

Hahaha, no wonder you see me as a weirdo. ; )

Sidenote: I erased the warblog entry before this. Just so you know, it's about 3 people who, for me, badly needs to change. I really hope they do, but if they choose to stay like that, I would gladly accept it.

Unang Huli

2007-06-06T19:52:00.002+08:00

Wala ng rason.

Unang araw pa lamang ng pasukan ay masama na ang dating sa aking ng taong ito. Siguro'y may ibang bagay na nagpagaan ng kung ano man ang dinadala ko ngayon pero sa pangkalahataan ay talaga namang nakakairita ang mga nangyari kanina. Dati ay inaakala ko na kung may pagbabago ay maganda ang mangyayari. Dati akala ko na ang bago ay mas maganda sa luma. Dati akala ko walang kwenta ang ibang mga bagay na pwedeng isantabi na lamang pero sa totoo'y puno ito ng saysay.

Marami daw namamatay sa maling akala. Patay na ba ako?

Hindi pa siguro. Ngunit ramdam ko ang lungkot. Lungkot na dulot ng pagbabago.

Gusto ko ng pagbabago para maayos ang binago. Baguhin upang ibalik ang sinimulan.

Siguro papasok na lang ulit ako bukas. Huling taon ko na pala. Ang rason na dala ng hinaharap ko; kung anu man ang rason na iyon, hindi ko alam. Nag-iisang rason ko para magpatuloy tapos hindi ko pa alam, sobrang ibang klase talaga. Siguro yung rason na iyon eh yung pangarap kong makatungtong sa kolehiyo na gusto kong pasukan. O kaya yung trabahong gusto kong makuha. O kaya yung mga taong gusto kong mapa-"WOW" dahil sa mga pinaggagagawa ko sa buhay ko. O kaya yung taong gusto kong makilala. O kaya. O kaya. O kaya kaya ko kaya?

Kailangan ko nang ubusin ang sarili ko para masimulan ang sarili kong pagbabago. Takot akong maubos. Pwede bang dagdagan ko na lang?

- - - - - - - - - - - - -

2007-06-04T12:58:00.000+08:00

Since I lost my train of thought for this certain entry, I'll just post the lyrics of the song, "Wordplay" by Jason Mraz. You can also play the song by clicking on the play button on the Media player. Enjoy singing along!

I've been all around the world
I've been a new sensation
But it doesn't really matter
In this generation
The sophomore slump is an uphill battle
And someone said it aint my scene
'Cause they need a new song
Like a new religion
Music for the television
I can't do the long division
Someone do the math
For the record label puts me on the shelf up in the freezer
Got to find another way to live the life of leisure
So I drop my top,
Mix and I mingle
Is everybody ready for the single and it goes...

(chorus)
Ha La La La La
Now listen closer to the verse I lay
(Ha La La La La)
It's all about the wordplay
(Ha La La La Love)
The wonderful thing it does
Because, because
I am the wizard of ooh's and ah's and fa-la-la's
Yeah the Mister A-Z
They say I'm all about the wordplay

And it's time to get ill I got your remedy
For those who don't remember me
Well let me introduce you to my style
I try to keep a jumble
And the lyrics never mumble
When the music's makin' people tongue-tied
You want a new song
Like a new religion
Music for the television
I can't do the long division
Someone do the math
For the people write me off like I'm a one-hit wonder
Got to find another way to keep from goin' under
Pull out the stops,
Got your attention
I guess it's time again for me to mention
The wordplay

(chorus)

I built a bridge across the stream of consciousness
It always seems to be a flowin'
But I don't know which way my brain is goin'
Oh the ryhmin' and the timin'
Keeps the melodies inside me
And they're climbin'
Til I'm running out of air
Are you prepared to take a dive into the deep end of my head
Are you listening to a single word I've said

Ha La La La La
Listen closer to the words I say
Ha La La La La
I'm stickin' with the wordplay
Ha La La La Love
The wonderful thing it does
Because, because
I am the wizard of ooh's and ah's and fa-la-la's
Yeah the Mister A-Z
They say I'm all about the wordplay

Ha La La La La
I'm all about the wordplay
Ha La La La La
I'm Stickin' with the wordplay
Ha La La La Love
I love the wonderful thing it does
Because, because
The ooh's and ah's and fa-la-la's i'm back in love
For the Mister A-Z they say
It's all about the wordplay

Lyrics by Lyrics 007
Music Player by Radio Blog Club

Another Chance?

2007-05-14T21:25:00.000+08:00

Suffrage (from the Latin suffragium, meaning "vote") is the civil right to vote, or the exercise of that right. [taken from http://www.wikipedia.org]

More than six hours have passed since the we have chosen the people who would lead the country in the next 3 years. We have chosen whether or not to exemplify our right to suffrage, the only thing left for us to do is wait and hope that we have chosen the right people.

Sometimes we tell a person to give us another chance to undo something which we have done. They may choose to comply with our request but most likely they won't. A teacher of mine once told us, "Sa totoong mundo, hindi kayo binibigyan ng isa pang pagkakataon. Maswerte ka kung may taong mabait na bibigyan ka pa ng isa pang pagkakataon. Kaya sa bawat bagay na gagawin mo, ibigay mo na ang lahat dahil hindi ka nakasisigurong may susunod pa." [In the real world, nobody gives you a second chance. You are lucky enough if you get to correct everything you've done. That is why you should everything you've got in everthing you've got, for you can never know it you will be given another chance."] He mentioned this during a rehearsal before our choir's concert. At first I didn't really take it that seriously; for one, it's too cliché, and second he was getting too annoying. Later on I realized that he was right and his point was the same as we live only one life; it's our choice if we wish to live it right or not. A choice which may lead to a better life or a choice which may lead to our road's end.

We have thrice made a mistake, and thrice we have succeeded in giving ourselves three second chances. It may seem too insensitive for me to say that we have not learned our lesson but it's the truth. We may be lucky, so lucky that fate has chosen to give us 6 chances to change our country; but for how long, nobody knows. We can only hope that our country won't crumble the next time we ask for another "second" chance.

We have finished making these choices when we dropped the ballots in our respective precincts. The results of our decisions, however, remains to be seen.

Seeking our origins

2007-04-29T17:41:00.001+08:00

Meditate \Med"i*tate\, v. To keep the mind in a state of contemplation; to dwell on anything in thought; to think seriously; to muse; to cogitate; to reflect. --Jer. Taylor. [1913 Webster][source http://onlinedictionary.datasegment.com/word/meditated]

I've decided to once again establish a blog of my own. Hopefully, I will be able to write meaningful opinion about life. I do not aim for people to visit my site for all I want is a place where I can give a piece of my thoughts to the world; but if they do, then I'm grateful for that.